My God delivers again..

Today...made me think of this song..

My God delivers again, oh, my God delivers again!
When is seems that all is lost
He reaches down His hand.
Then all the forces of evil have to flee at His command;
Just when things look hopeless, my God delivers again.

I admit that the devil let those seeds of doubts sneak in and play havoc, but at the end of the day...My God is in control. He used the hands of the doctors and now the nurses to bring my sweet mother through this. I think God confused Dr. Carlton so that Dr. Hennington would step in. We don't know the why sometimes, but God makes things clear eventually and the change of doctors is clear to me. Mom would have never been satisfied with the other doctor...a doctor that wasn't a Christian. I wonder if mom dreamed, I know she had that peace...she dreamed about Mark a couple nights ago...I wonder if he visited with her while she was out. I am almost sure he did. On the way to the hospital this morning and this fairly new song came on...He will deliver me. It says when I am down and worried that I'm reminded of the fourth man walking around in the fire with the three Hebrew children...He delivered them, He will deliver me. And He did....He delivered me, Mom, Dad...all of us. I had this horrible thought while she was in there...what if God wanted to take mom, she would make an awesome angel. What if He wanted to take her to get to the heart and soul of her children and her family. There are those that are not where they should be and as much as Mark's death was a turning point for me...what if God wanted to use Mom in the same way for others. I had selfish thoughts with that .... I want it all... my mom and my family closer to Christ, not just closer...walking the walk, living it every day. I have such talented brothers...ohh how much talent is there.

Two weeks ago, God told me that if I don't start singing for Him that I will lose it. He convicted me so. If I wouldn't do it for him...I should do it for my mom and dad. I fell on my face crying out that I would. The next day Lisa and I sang at church, I was nervous but I looked out at my mom with tears streaming down her face. I looked at my dad on the front row with his eyes closed drinking in every word. Then I realized tears were in my eyes and the Spirit of God just filled me right on up. I sang The Lighthouse and though Todd sings it the best ever...it felt great! It was a few days later that I was asked to sing at Mary Erb's funeral. Something I said I would NEVER EVER do. I didn't hesitate to say yes...I didn't say it...God did. That Saturday morning, I was nervous until I got to the church and then all of it went away and I stood up there in front of so many family and friends and sang How Great Thou Art...and you know what, I didn't sing it for mom or dad. I didn't even sing it for Mary or those family members out there. I sang it for God. That was the first time I felt like I was really using my talent. I regret it has taken this long.

Family, we aren't promised another day with mom or dad. Just as close as mom was to meeting Mark and God today...we have the same chance really. God can snatch us up and it could happen any second. I KNOW....if I close my eyes down here, I will open them in Heaven. I hope and pray that you all have that same assurance. *Sermon off :)*

I love you all so much and am so blessed to have such a wonderful and close family. I could type about each of you and how much you mean but that would take a long long time so just know I love you and can't wait to spend more time, more happy time with you all.

Lori and I are planning a get together around the 4th of July...the 7th I think is that Saturday and we are planning it for her house and a pig pickin with all the trimmings. Soon as the 'planning committee' haha can get back together we will get it going.

ALSO...women we are going to Myrtle Beach the first part of November for Jubilee by the Sea at my old church. It is lots of singing, preaching, missionaries...just a lot of God! We are planning on getting a few rooms or however many we need or maybe a condo and stay on the beach and shop too. So start putting back those pennies! It is way early so no excuses not to go. So far I know that Lisa, Lori, Louise, Mom, Gladys, Me and Ellen are going. I can't wait!

OK...I am going back to bed. I went to sleep at 6 and just woke up to get in bed. Thank you Lord for letting me sleep some. Muscle Relaxer for my back helped with that too.

Love you all,
Hope